


Stumbling

by LexOfTheRiver



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Angst, Body Dysphoria, Character's Name Spelled as Viktor, Family Feels, Gen, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Trans Character, at least happy enough, but yuuri and viktor are good dads, just realized my sisters gonna read this, no beta we die like men, not healthy coping methods, smh, that’s all that matters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-14
Updated: 2021-01-14
Packaged: 2021-03-18 17:41:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,369
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28747098
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LexOfTheRiver/pseuds/LexOfTheRiver
Summary: The whole day was absolute shit from the start, and he knew it right away. He woke up a little too late, completely missed breakfast in his rush and. Oh yeah. He had a reminder that dysphoria really is a bitch.—Alt. Yuri wears his binder to practice.
Relationships: Katsuki Yuuri & Yuri Plisetsky, Katsuki Yuuri/Victor Nikiforov, Victor Nikiforov & Yuri Plisetsky
Kudos: 64





	Stumbling

The whole day was absolute shit from the start, and he knew it right away. He woke up a little too late, completely missed breakfast in his rush and. Oh yeah. He had a reminder that dysphoria really is a bitch.

Yuri looked at himself in the bathroom mirror, glaring at his feminine frame, hatred seething through his clenched teeth. He grabbed a towel from the closet and then, still glaring at the mirror, turned the lights off. He ran a hot shower, sitting on the floor for most of the time, uncomfortable for many more reasons than just the hard surface. He sighed, covering his face as tears started to stream. This was the only time he’d get to do this, and he’d take advantage of it. Yuri wasn’t stupid. He knew he needed to cry.

Getting out of the shower and checking the time was when he realized he wasn’t having any breakfast that morning, only resulting in a heavy sigh. He dressed quickly, knowing he’d be late for practice, but as he put on his shirt, he slowed. Normally for practice, Yuri would just slip on a sports bra one size too small for him and his shirt, and it was usually enough. But today, putting his shirt on and looking down made him feel horrible. He still could see his chest and he hated it. He hated what he looked like, especially right now, and he knew he had to suck it up but he didn’t think he could at the moment.

Or, did he?

He glanced over at the binder hanging over his desk chair and without giving it much of a second thought, slipped out of his clothing to put it on, feeling instantly better. He wasn’t allowed to wear it at practice, he knew that— Yakov had made that incredibly clear the moment Yuri excitedly mentioned his grandfather’s gift to him— but Yuri couldn’t help it, not really. He’d take a break every couple hours, making some dumb excuse to relax in the bathroom and take it off, and then he’d come back out and continue practicing. It was foolproof!

Viktor and Yuuri called for him to leave not too long after, and he quickly grabbed his things before doing his hair and following them to their car to head to the rink. Neither Viktor nor Yuuri commented on his seemingly flatter chest. He was thankful they didn’t notice.

When they arrived at the rink, he noticed a couple stares from his coach, but only slouched forward a bit in an attempt to hide it, which worked better than he had thought. Yakov looked away, instead focusing on speaking to Viktor, presumably about his program, leaving Yuri and Yuuri to put their stuff away and change into their skates. Yuri’s plan seemed to be working fairly well so far!

However, on the ice was an entirely different story. He had tumbled here and there, which was expected, but usually he got back up with ease. Now, every time he fell, he felt like the wind had been knocked out of him and it took a couple more seconds. He tried not to concern anyone, but after a while, it seemed like everyone’s eyes were on him. It wasn’t like he wasn’t used to that, of course he was, but he only felt guilty now. He felt like everyone was watching to catch him in a lie instead of watching for him to slip up on the ice. Instead of feeling like a figure skater, he felt like a criminal. A criminal who was bound to be caught any second now.

Sure enough, one more slip up came, Yuri too distracted to pay attention to what he had been doing properly, and he hit the ground hard. He groaned in pain, alerting the others quickly. He rolled over, sprawled out across the cold ice, trying to catch his breath. Maybe it wasn’t a great idea, but it was still better than his mind screaming at him.

The first one he saw by his side was Yuuri, who knelt down, panicked, and lifted his head up in his lap gently, unsure of the situation.

“Yurio?” he asked, concern laced in his voice. Yuri would never admit it felt nice being fawned over. Yuri looked up at him, squinting at the bright lights. “Hey, are you alright?”

“‘m fine,” Yuri muttered, attempting to sit up. He felt his chest ache and sharp pains followed after. He kept telling himself it was worth it.

“You don’t sound like it.” Yuuri stood, helping Yuri up with him, looking a little too concerned for his liking. Sure, he liked it, but it seemed too condescending to him. Like he was playing the pity card.

“I said I’m fine,” Yuri said, a little more stern than his previous statement.

“I know, but you’ve been really out of it all practice and I just—“ Yuri cut him off, more frustrated than he should be.

“Don’t fucking pull that. Just go back to whatever the fuck you were doing and leave me alone.” Yuuri blinked, unsure how to respond to the sudden harshness. Yuri pulled away from him, roughly, but before he could go much further, he felt the horrible, sharp, stabbing pains in his chest again, causing him to double over in pain. Yuuri came closer, rubbing his back gently and noticing the layer underneath. Immediately his eyes went wide with realization.

Yuuri reached down to take Yuri’s hand, pulling him gently to the edge of the rink and stepping off, sitting next to him on one of the benches, Viktor making his way to their side, concerned at Yuuri’s sudden tenseness. He looked up at his husband, eyes wide with what seemed to be fear.

“Yura.” He spoke so gently. “Did you wear your binder during practice?” Yuri looked up at them quickly, registering the concern and disappointment on their faces rather quickly. He felt himself get red with embarrassment.

“So what if I did?”

“Yura, you know you can’t do that. That could be dangerous for you,” Viktor spoke.

“Look,” Yuuri started, “we’re going to take you into the locker rooms, okay?” He was rubbing the back of Yuri’s hand in comfort. Yuri tried to protest, but Yuuri only lifted a finger and shushed him. “You’re going to take off your binder, and breathe, alright?” Yuri so desperately wanted to decline and say he was alright, but something in him knew they were right. So, he didn’t protest as they stood up to take him to the locker rooms, locking the door behind them so no one would come in no matter what. Yuri stared at them for a second before sighing and turning around, both of them looking away from him to give him some privacy. He took off his shirt, biting back a groan of pain as he moved. He then slowly started taking off his binder, silently glad at the rush of relief that came with it, only for that to quickly be replaced with anxiety. He glanced down at his chest, immediately filled with a wave of dysphoria and guilt.

Not too long had passed before he felt streams of tears falling, mimicking his morning routine. He choked back silent sobs, feeling his whole body shake. He tried not to be too loud, but it didn’t matter. Viktor and Yuuri had already heard.

Next thing he knew, a large jacket, far too big for his small frame, was being hung around his shoulders, accompanied by a muttered, “Zip it up.” Yuri did as he was told before turning around to see both Yuuri and Viktor, a heartbroken look in both of their eyes.

“Yura,” Yuuri muttered. Not a single word else had to come out before Yuri practically flung himself at the two, feeling more tears stream down his face as he sobbed, holding onto both of them. They both were surprised at the sudden affection, but quickly deemed it welcomed as they held him close, letting him cry.

Yuri felt shitty all day. And he knew the feeling wouldn’t go away no matter how hard he tried. But he had Yuuri and Viktor.

**Author's Note:**

> AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH


End file.
